My days actually go just like everyone elses if you subtract the added doctors visits and tests. Yesterday I dropped my cat off at the vet to get four teeth extracted and shaved. He is a 16 lb rescue cat that has some issues from being malnourished for four years. We have had him for a year and are spending so much just to get him healthy. It's totally worth it. He is the biggest lover and one of the best additions to our family. He is now totally bald because we had to shave him to. He almost looks like a poodle. At least all of the mats are gone and he won't be getting any more abscessed teeth.
After the vet my boys came home. They have been gone for a week. I miss them so much when the go to their dads. They had so much energy and I didn't know what to do with it all. We danced and played little Simon Says games. I know they are a little old for that but we were laughing and having fun. I also had my niece Kayla over who is the biggest helper of them all. Two of the grand kids received my moms heart, Kayla and Matthew. They are the most giving unconditional kids I know. You can see it in their eyes and feel it in their hugs. I'm not saying that the other kids aren't special in their own way. It's like passing down certain traits a leg twitch or someones laughter.
After some long awaited play and hugs...I got my hair done. The first time in almost two years. I felt so good. For two hours it was about me and being pampered. I talked to my hair dresser about the possibility of having surgery and how squeamish is her stomach. She said she would have no problems teaching me how to do my hair after surgery. She also told me that it wouldn't be a problem since I have so much of it. She is the best hair dresser ever and I would never go to anyone else. She told me not to worry about it.
After that I came home, took the kids swimming, took Kayla home, got the cat from the vet, made dinner, cleaned up, and went to bed.....Pretty full day.
I felt really productive the last two days. Some days I'm so tired that I can't seem to get off the couch or out of the house. Other days it's the opposite. I want to see and do everything. I make lists. I don't get mad at myself for not being able to finish something today because I can do it tomorrow. What I do know is that I'm not depressed. This is real and what I have been experiencing for the past few years is real. Being tired and scared of almost everything. Not wanting to do anything. Then in a blink of an eye I'm fine. All of the 24/7 PMS that I thought was because I was mental or something.....Not me....Just the squatters in my head.....
May 22, 2009
8 years ago